Hwedupbap.

Really, that's a word. As a child (/prior to 4:27p today) I thought "hwedupbap" was pronounced "Pedobap." Come to find out, pedobap is an abbreviation for pedobaptist. I assumed that would have something to do with small children and a Pedobear-esque figure, so really I wasn't so far off. I'm basically on the same language level as a two year old Korean with a speech impediment, unless this is a prospective employer in which case everything on my resumé is true.

Now that you've been primed with a useless smattering of non-phonemic pronunciation respellings, I give you Hwedupbap ("Hwe" - fish, "dup" - over, "bap" -rice/grains). It's similar to the popular bibimbap, but through a pescatarian raw foodist's lens. In a positive, edible way. A poor man's dish made extremely chic, hwedupbap throws together raw seafood, vegetables, rice, and whatever other scraps are left in your fridge/hovel. Gochujang (a Korean sweet & spicy red pepper sauce) covers up any less than perfect bits in the end so it's unnecessary to put this much effort into presentation:

But when has that ever stopped me.

The recipe is simple and consists of three parts: Cook rice. Cut a lot of stuff. Mix everything in a large bowl with gochujang. The gochujang comes in an extremely thick paste so you'll need to dilute it with water, vinegar and a touch of sugar (3:2:1 gochujang:water:vinegar ratio, or to taste). You can use whatever seafood you'd like - here I've used razor clams, raw tuna, shrimp (blanched, but I guess you can skip that step with ebi), salmon and tai. I'd say fish roe makes up the major texture component, plus it seasons the entire dish so don't skip it. I added four kinds because I'm into being excessive: pollack, wasabi seasoned, black lumpfish and salmon roe. I also included slivered daikon, cucumber, red lettuce, Asian pear, scallions and daikon sprouts.

Like I said, you could just chuck all of this in a bowl without fussing over bias cuts and color blocking because it goes from this:

To this:

Also, don't use extremely hot rice. It'll partially cook your fish and set you on your way to mealy lukewarm stomach virus territory. I had to use up some leftover brown rice so I heated it ever so slightly to room temp before adding. Enjoy!

This post is brought to you by mother dearest who brought all these ingredients for me from Ranch Mart. *clap, clap, clap* Hurray, I'm spoiled!